Abandon ship !!!!

Washing the breakfast dishes I seemed to have this strange sensation of falling forwards into the sink and looking out of the galley window I could see no fields - no horizon, just water !!!!!

"There is something seriously wrong with the boat!   shouted Cap'n Denise from the shower.

"You are not kidding........what the hell is going on?"  I replied with a slight tone of concern.

Rushing outside to make visual sense of my desire to fall-over, I realised we were hanging from our ropes at a steep angle, where just five-minutes previously we were at our normal inland-waterway horizontal situation.

Most of the water in the canal had gone and we were leaning alarmingly.

'Don't panic Captain Mainwaring' ........I thought.
"I suggest you get ready quick, we have a situation" ......I suggested to Denise with only the slightest hint of panic in my voice.

What the bloody hell !!!  I mused appraising the rapidly disappearing water and throwing our dog 'Suzy' onto dry-land in an effort to stop her falling over. .

No wonder the kettle keeps falling off the stove..........!!  Denise manages a smile despite San Serriffe being well and truly aground due to a lack of water on the Trent and Mersey near Wheelock

A few minutes before everything had been O.K and a hire-boat moored behind had sailed-off with no problems regarding water level.

Mobile in hand, I found the Canal and River Trust emergency phone-book number and hit the 'call' button.

"Hi..........you have no water in the Trent and Mersey canal near lock 60 " I reported.
"Trent and what ?" was the reply.
"Trent and Mersey !!" I struggled to keep calm and speak clearly.
" Sorry, computer cannot find it" said the voice
"What!!!!!!!!!!  T-R-E-N-T AND M-E-R-S-E-Y !! one of your principal waterways!! slightly losing my composure.
"Sorry, for some reason it is not coming up on the computer, sorry - hang on" she said.
"Oh yes, I will certainly hang on.......my boat is at a very steep angle !!!" I said.
"At a steep angle, you say, oh right ?  O.K putting you through" she said

"Hi"    came a man's voice
 I explained precisely as possible that the Trent and Mersey had drained of water above locks 59-60 near the M6 not very far from Wheelock and I was leaning at this crazy angle with the boat threatening to roll-over.
"Is that near Stoke?"  He asked.
"Stoke????? No!! nowhere near Stoke" ..... I answered frustrated by my need to repeat my exact location regarding place names. bridges numbers and locks.
"Oh right, we will have to get somebody there as soon as possible" came a positive reply.

At that point a fellow boater came by and explained that he was a few locks down and had taken it on himself to drain the upper pounds ( including 'mine' ) to 'bring some water down' to his level.  

Despite the upper pounds being reasonably long all this had done was leave them virtually dry.

I managed to make a cup of tea, by wedging a saucepan against the kettle so that it did not slide off the stove....... boat seemed to be wedged firmly without movement sideways, so we sat stoically at the steeply-angled stern with our hot tea. Very British.

" Shall I re-arrange the deck-chairs" ....asked cap'n Denise with a smile.
" What?" I asked
" That is what they did on the Titanic"  came the smiled reply.
" No use doing that, they would just fall over the side...... lets drink our tea and put the life-jacket on the dog" ....I said

Time passed.....as time does.

 " Hiya".........came the greeting from a friendly Canal and River Trust man.

He explained that they were bringing water from several pounds above and would have us moving in a short while.

He had come from the locks lower down and had got a good tongue-lashing from disgruntled boaters held-up there.

" You can only do your best, it is not your fault" I commiserated.

When we had sufficient water to float he came back and helped to move the boat off the ledge it had wedged on.  He explained that a boat was coming down and would we wait to ensure a 'one-up, one down' regime to maintain the water levels.

We would like to say many thanks to this friendly guy and his colleague positioned a couple of miles or up the canal ensuring a supply of water.   It is very frustrating to be in a 'no water' situation, but helps no one if you express your frustration in blunt terms to the guys trying to sort the situation out.........any problems caused by lock-gear failure ( principal problem on this occasion) was certainly not of their making. Apparently the low water levels had been obvious for several days but nobody had reported it.


We were very fortunate to make progress after only several hours, the navigation being restricted seriously for a few days afterwards whilst problems with paddles on lock 61 and the mitre-liner on lock 63 had been repaired.  All the pounds towards Rode Heath were very low but we managed to keep moving in the centre of the canal and had to smile after saying 'hello' to the owner of a boat on a permanent mooring sitting on the stern of his boat with it's propeller showing high and dry..............

" Might as well do a bit of fishing............nothing else to do "  he said with a resigned smile.


 .....Always remember in life  'Seize the moment'  if a Brandy is offered as the ship goes down, it is not the time to become teetotal........

and ......."He who is not panicking does not realise the serious of the situation"   ( my favourite )

Rampant Reeds choke the Trent and Mersey canal.......a look into the future?

" Baldrick.........BALDRICK !!!! "..... shouted the Big ditch controller
" Yes sir........YES SIR, you shouted?     ....... answered Baldrick
" We have a problem, Baldrick "   .....snapped the Big ditch controller
" We ?  WE ? sir......it is usually just ME who has the problem .....sneered Baldrick
" Do not be facetious Baldrick, it is beneath you, this is serious "  answered the Big ditch controller.

"There has been a complaint from a customer, they are unhappy with the width of the Trent and Mersey canal. They are unhappy with their experience.  They said their customer experience is below standard !!"......... Wailed the Big ditch controller.

"Who's standard?"  .......asked Baldrick
"Do you not listen? THEIR standard !!....how dare they !! "  Big Ditch controller replied in an apoplectic shrill voice.

"What seems to be the problem ?" ................asked Baldrick
"Reeds are the problem, apparently. Lots of them".............snapped Big Ditch controller
"I have been telling you about this for years"................came the resigned reply from Baldrick
"What do you know about anything ? especially Reeds?...........sneered Big Ditch controller

Baldrick's nightmare come true. - reed growth on the Trent and Mersey canal, near Middlewich

 "Well, let me see........are you talking about Phragmites Australis, otherwise known as the common reed to people like you....... this can colonize 5 metres per year and research suggests it exudes an acid to destroy competitors or perhaps we have a problem with Azolla Filliculoides ?   Azolla is actually a weed and attempts to control it by weed munching Weevils seems to be successful especially in North Yorkshire, the Gloucester and Sharpness canal and recently the Huddersfield Broad canal"    .......answered Baldrick with a smug expression.

"Baldrick!........BALDRICK!....I am the one paid to be clever around here. Just shut up and listen"
  Big Ditch controller said unkindly.

" I want you to just find out what these boaters are talking about. I will not have gossip of this nature in my ditches...er, canals. Get out there Baldrick and report the situation back to me PDQ  if not sooner!"
 ........... Big Ditch controller snapped in his usual commanding style.

"Yessir.......right away sir "   ..........smirked Baldrick touching his forelock.

Baldrick went about his business, as only Baldrick could.  Time passed as time does..

" O.K Baldrick, what do have to report ?".......... asked Big Ditch controller.
" It is bad sir...........very bad"  .........came the sad reply from Baldrick.
"Well ?"   .......asked Big Ditch controller
" Reeds are everywhere,sir.  It is a nightmare they are growing before your eyes......and .....and I have something even more terrible to report"  ........ replied Baldrick his upper-lip quivering with emotion.
"Get a grip, man. What are you talking about ?" ......... replied Big Ditch controller in his usual understanding manner.
"The boat reported missing with all hands between Middlewich and Anderton last year............the reeds have had it" replied Baldrick.
" Not the ?" demanded Big Ditch controller.
" Yessir, I am afraid so........ the hire boat 'Lesser-spotted Ditch Warbler'. It is terrible sir, terrible, the crew are all skeletons even the little dog.  Suffocated by rampant giant reeds what a terrible way to go! " Wailed Baldrick

"Oh dear, never mind, worse things happen at sea " replied the unfeeling Big Ditch controller.
" Shall I order the Reed cutting machine, sir ?" asked Baldrick
"Budgets, budgets, got to watch the budgets, Baldrick. What is the remaining width of the navigation?" asked you know who.
" Six foot , four inches, sir" replied Baldrick, with his usual accurate efficiency
"Plenty of room for them narrowboat thingummys, that is why they are called NARROW boats, eh?....what are they six foot ten inches ?" smirked the BDC


" Yes, but they are crashing head-on into each other on the blind bends, we surely cannot lose anymore to the killer Reed! The humanity ! oh the humanity!!!!!!!!!  ......replied an emotional Baldrick

"They are crashing head-on into each other on the blind bends"   Reed choked Trent and Mersey near Middlewich

Killer reeds (Phragmites Australias) Trent and Mersey canal en-route to Middlewich.

"Control yourself Baldrick!!!!!   I have a cunning plan, now listen carefully "     .....smirked Big Ditch controller.


" Get onto the hire company and order a set of traffic lights.......place one a few miles past 'Big-lock' where the Reeds start and the other a few miles up the cut where the reeds finish. Problem solved, problem sorted ".......... Smiled a smug Big Ditch controller.


" But sir..........but sir .........." objected Baldrick


" You see Baldrick, that is why I am Big Ditch controller......and you are, er, well just a minion - carry on Baldrick. "   Big Ditch controller dismissed Baldrick in his inimitable style.

" Yessir " replied a resigned Baldrick, touching his forelock with two fingers waggling in a strange upwards repetitive motion.

Escape from Wigan and wandering the Weaver.

Retracing our steps from Liverpool was not without problems.  Navigation closure of the Leeds and Liverpool canal at Wigan had held up boats for several days.

Eventually a phone call from a canal and River Trust supervisor announced that the navigation was open but the Leigh junction pound at the bottom of the Wigan flight was low due to a pump failure. We decided to chance it in company with two other boats. 

Water level was in actual fact VERY low and Cap'n Denise struggled to maintain steerage as I walked along the towpath to operate the locks on the Leigh branch. We did not realize that the boat was difficult to steer because 'San Serriffe' had collected a large bale of razor wire around the skeg - yes, RAZOR wire!  

Eventually Denise struggled the boat into the lock and I opened the paddles to drop the water level. Out went our companion boat but San Serriffe would not budge an inch.

"Give it some more throttle you must have grounded on something" I shouted from the top of the lock.
" It will not move - no matter what !!"  Denise shouted back.

Puzzled I fretted on top of the lock and eventually caught sight of the wire strands coming
through the lock gates and holding 'San Serriffe' as fast as any rope. This was a deep lock and Denise could not move the boat under the lock ladder.

Oh well, this was a job for the Caped Crusader, as I climbed down into the lock and managed to leap onto the bow. with some difficulty
"It's a dirty, dangerous job, but somebody has to do it" .......I muttered in my best caped-crusader speak, trying to keep my nerve from collapsing completely.

Crew from our two companion boats gathered in support as I produced my Caped Crusader secret weapon pack for combating razor-wire from the front locker. All boats on the 'Leeds and Liverpool' should have one.

This kit includes :

1. A pair of pond gloves ( weapon grade chain-mail covering if possible  )
2. A pair of the finest cheap bolt-cutters that China can produce.

Cap'n Denise fished for the wire with the boat hook and our helpers held the boat steady and the wire taught with ropes from the top of the lock.  Caped-Crusader leaned down and like a scene from an old WW2 film cut the wire. It was not complicated and really did not need the quip....

" Under NO circumstances cut the BLUE wire"  .......as all the best bomb disposal wire-cutting dialogues seem to go. 

With the clutches of the razor-wire gone, we headed for the untroubled waters of the Leigh branch leaving the problems of Wigan far behind.  Oh, the freedom of it all........no wire, lots of water under the boat and the 'Dover-Lock' pub not many miles away - all is well that ends well, as they say.

Surviving the lesser challenges of the Bridgewater and returning back onto the Trent and Mersey canal we decided to have a few peaceful days on the River Weaver.  Anderton boat-lift passage booked, we immediately ran into the tail-end of Hurricane 'Bertha' bouncing torrents of rain on our heads and gusts of winds that made boat handling just a tad difficult.........'what? no razor-wire ?'  I hear you say.   

Boats leaving the Anderton boat-lift.

Sharing the Anderton boat lift 'Caisson' (tank) with another boat we were lowered to the river level whilst the opposing 'Caisson' brought the River trip boat upwards to the canal level with everybody waving as the they passed.

Going up ....... trip boat passes upwards as we descend.

Anderton boat lift.    River Weaver.

Anderton boat-lift has been doing this since 1871 until it was left semi-derelict in 1983. Restored and re-opened in 2003 it transports boats up and down on a daily-basis. Turning left towards Northwich you cannot help be impressed with this tranquil wide river - a perfect antidote for any stress you have in life.
               Many years back you might have had a bit of stress in a small boat as a large sea-going coaster came steaming towards you. Rest assured sadly that is a thing of the past and pleasure craft are the only traffic to worry about.

River Weaver.                                                             Copyright.

Northwich - River Weaver

Northwich eventually floats gently into view with its new waterfront developments and marina. Stopping before town swing-bridge we visited the Canal and River Trust services
situated awkwardly on top of a wharf originally designed for large barges and the average narrowboat needs a long hose to reach the tap at the top. After an overnight at the nearby 48 hour visitor moorings we continued on towards Hunt's lock and the beautiful Vale Royal stretch of the river.

Hunt's Lock.  River Weaver.

All the locks are manned and they now use the smaller locks rather the ship-sized ones that require a gigantic amount of water.  A quick call on the mobile helps the lock-keepers  time your arrival with other traffic and everything is usually ready for you.  These guys are both friendly and polite and willing to share their knowledge of the river ringing the next lock for you if you require to go through. A rope with a loop is lowered down from the top of the lock enabling the helmsman to attach the boat centre rope which is then lifted to the top bollard with the end passed back down so the boat is secure when the lock fills. 



I first saw the Vale Royal stretch from a Dutch-barge trip boat many years ago and was pleased to see it had lost none of its enchantment.......a beautiful stretch of wide river.

Vale Royal...........River Weaver.                             All images strictly author copyright.

Passing through Vale Royal locks we passed the salt-works which supported commercial river traffic for years. We were going to support the brewery trade by visiting the 'Red Lion' at Winsford which is the end of navigational responsibility for Canal and River Trust. It is possible to go further into a large lake known as a 'flash' but parts are very shallow so it is left to your own judgement. 


If get a chance...........'Wander the Weaver' you will not be disappointed.
 




 

"Its not the leaving of Liverpool............"

A Renaissance .....Liverpool waterfront from Canning dock.                    All images strictly author copyright.

"Its not the leaving of Liverpool that grieves me......." 
as the song goes........but the rubbish. First few miles out of  Liverpool is possibly the worst example of dumped rubbish that we have experienced during our travels on the canal system in the U.K.


Innumerable plastic bags grabbing at the prop' - large pieces of wood, sheets of hard plastic, three
floating LPG gas bottles in as many yards, supermarket trolleys, and under one bridge half a dozen road-cones waiting to foul the prop'   These are not helped by the extensive natural hazard of banks of weeds on each side.......I paint not a pretty pictured.

Liverpool together with Canal and River Trust has gone a very, very, long way to welcome narrowboats and indeed Liverpool welcomes visitors from all over the world...... In my experience Liverpool local authority seem to go to great lengths to keep the streets clean, but are certainly not helped by the 'somebody else will pick it up' mentality to litter dumping.

In regard to to the Leeds and Liverpool canal ( just the few miles near Liverpool centre are affected ) especially these days of  Canal and River Trust's successful volunteer campaign, it would not be difficult for Liverpool Council and CRT to join in partnership to provide funding for a boat to collect the very worse of the rubbish perhaps once a month.

Leaving of Liverpool - assisted passage boats return towards Aintree.

This is the second time we have brought the boat to Liverpool via the 'link' and would recommend it to anybody.  Liverpool waterfront is experiencing a fantastic renaissance and a thoroughly welcoming and interesting place to visit.  A great experience spoiled by the first impressions of visiting  boat crews on the canal approach to Liverpool.  

Boat crews returning from the Liverpool Link negotiate Stanley locks.